Baby girl you’re a star, don’t let him tell you you’re not.
The right person will bring out the best in you, not the stress in you. What does that mean? That means that with the right person, you will flourish. You will smile. You will be happy. You will glow. You will be secure and confident in yourself and in your relationship. You will not do things that are out of character. I know when I am not with the right person because I do things that are not typical of me. My inner balance is completely off.
There is someone who was in my life for the past year and I was stressed 90% of our relationship. Constant worrying and insecurity. It was noticeable to everyone around me, including family, friends and co-workers. I am naturally a social, friendly and fun person to be around. But this person brought out anxiety, fear and insecurity. When he is not around, I am good. Easy going. Calm. But as soon as I am with him, everything gets disrupted. This person is surrounded by drama and he brings that into all of his relationships. I don’t think he can function without it and it took a major toll on my mental well being.
I then met someone who was the complete opposite of his personality and I noticed an immediate change in my disposition. My friends and family all told me that I am “normal” again. It felt so good to not be constantly worried about what was going to happen. To not question my relationship all of the time. To have someone consistent. It didn’t work out in the end but I learned from that relationship what I do want. I learned that a relationship can exist without drama. And it feels good.
Having drama in a relationship is like a drug. It is actually addicting and very toxic. Drama creates an adrenaline like feeling, a high and then when you make up, its like coming down from the high. More drama is needed to experience that high feeling again. You end up in an endless cycle of make ups and break ups.
The older I get, the more I see how unhealthy that cycle is and the more I know that I do not ever want another relationship like that again. I have learned when to let go and when to move on.