Real life vs. Social Media
If someone really wants to be with you, they will. No one is ever too busy or “dealing with a lot” when they are genuinely interested in you. Those are easy excuses for someone that either is just not that into you or is too lazy to put in any effort.
Do not make excuses or try to rationalize this in your mind. It is what it is. As women, we try to be “understanding”. We don’t want to come off as too pushy or impatient. And you shouldn’t be. I am not saying to chase this person or to settle for their non-chalant attitude towards you. I am saying to leave it alone. It is ok to ask where the relationship is going or how the other person feels about you. But if their actions don’t match their words, you have to make a move.
It is a known fact that when a man is interested in a woman, he will pursue her. He will not be lazy about it because he doesn’t want another man to get to her. Men are territorial by nature and they go after what they want.
All you need to do is look at the animal kingdom for proof of this. Watch any National Geographic show or Planet Earth on Netflix and you will see what I mean. In almost any species of animal, the man pursues his female conquest and he goes hard for her. He might do a dance for her. He might fight another male competitor for her. He makes all sorts of noises to express his interest.
I watched Planet Earth the other day and saw Kimono Dragons fighting for a female dragon. I saw a male bird return to an island to meet up with his female counterpart that he meets every year in the same place to mate. He sat there alone and focused and sat patiently waiting for her to show up. I saw a sloth climb through trees and swim across a river when he heard a female on a neighboring island. A pack of male flamingos were literally marching in formation to impress a woman. Don’t believe me? Look at this vid below
Females in nature do not pick a male that does not pursue her. She picks the male who fights for her attention. The man who shows he will stop at nothing to have her. She knows she is the object of his desire and knows that he has to win her love. I never saw a female animal say “maybe he’s just busy” or “maybe it’s something I did”.
I’m not saying that the next man you are interested in should tap dance for you or get in a fist fight for you , but I am saying that you should recognize your worth and don’t feel guilty about making someone put effort into wooing you.
It’s amazing how much things can change in ten years. I often laugh at how different I am now in comparison to ten years ago. What used to be considered “fun” is no longer desirable. What used to be important now seems so trivial.
Here is a little list that I’m sure many can relate to and maybe you’ll get a good laugh from it. Feel free to add any other items you can think of or if you are older, let me know how this list will change once again.
20’s: Party all night then go straight to work
30’s: Party then needs to call out sick from work
20’s: Doesn’t get to club until midnight
30’s: Prefers daytime activities so they can be in bed by midnight
20’s: Loves being in big crowds and is tolerant of being bumped by random ppl
30’s: Gets anxiety attack and flips after being bumped more than once
20’s: Likes going to clubs and house parties
30’s: Likes dinners, shows or paint and sip
20’s: Drinks one too many cranberry vodkas even though history shows the night will end leaning over a toilet
30’s: Drinks one glass of alcohol and can’t keep their eyes open
20’s: Go to work/school then come home and get ready for your night out while listening to party music to get you pumped up
30’s: Go to work then come home and get straight into pajamas and watch your DVR recordings
20’s: Gets pissed if plans get cancelled
30’s: Prays that plans get cancelled
20’s: Enjoys hearing all the latest gossip
30’s: Too tired and concerned with paying my bills to worry about other people’s drama
20’s: Thinks life will end if relationship doesn’t work out
30’s: Looks back on past relationships and thinks “thank goodness that didn’t work out!”
20’s: Self conscious about being naked in front of a partner and critiques every “flaw” she has
30’s: Looks at her body and thinks “I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly!”
20‘s: I can’t wait to get home and talk on the phone for hours
30‘s: “Eh, we’ll talk when I see you”
20‘s: I can’t wait to live on my own and work and pay bills and be independent
30‘s: “OMG it’s like I’m working just to pay bills!”